Bad Valentine's Gifts
- Shop here if you want privacy.
- Please don't give these items as Valentine's Day Gifts
- You may not live to see February 15th.
The Worst Valentine's Day Gifts of 2013
With Valentine's Day ominously approaching, lovers are scrambling to purchase a unique gift. Boxes of chocolates and bouquets of roses are no longer thoughtful enough. Don’t be frantic though. Frantic shoppers are prone to mistakes. Before you buy the wrong item, check this list to make sure you are not buying one of the 10 worst Valentine’s Day gifts. The Worst Valentine's Day Gifts For Men
Fresh Balls – Fresh Balls is a scrotum lotion that keep men’s genitals smelling fresh and feeling dry. Is this a real problem? If it is, do you think February fourteenth is the right day to discuss it?
Back Hair Groomer – What? You can’t give a guy a device that he uses to groom his own back hair. As his significant other, that is your job.
The Lowdown on Going Down – Some gifts say I love you, some gifts say I care about you. This gift says “You stink at oral sex.”
Nullo Pills – As a medication, Nullo removes your body odor and replaces it with a minty sort of scent. Medication is never a gift, especially B.O. medication.
Enlarge Quick Liquid – Nothing will tell your man that the relationship is in jeopardy more than impotence and urgency.
The Worst Valentine's Day Gifts For Women
18 Again Vaginal Shrink Cream – If she turned you 18 again you’d probably start popping zits on the bathroom mirror. Don’t ask her to revert back either.
Fresh Breasts – Dude, listen up. Boobs don’t need a lotion to keep them smelling fresh. Boobs are awesome. If you buy a woman some type of lotion that she is supposed to put on her boobs, then she won’t let you experience her boobs unless she has applied the lotion. Wake up brother! This could actually restrict your access to the boobs.
Bubbles Butt Lifting Lingerie - So close to being a great gift! But this is the wrong kind of lingerie. Trust us.
Deep Throat - She can get this for you. You can’t get it for her.
Booty Enhancing Panties – This underwear will make her look like she has a bigger butt, until she takes them off, while you are standing there. How is that going to work?
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